Post by Reverend Dave Johnson on May 22, 2007 23:16:28 GMT -5
Okay guys, I can't believe so many of you are disagreeing with this. It's pure genius. It's what I've been trying to say for years! Harry Potter is clearly the work of the devil himself, and must be destroyed! Some more points:
1. Harry's scar = Zeus's lightning bolt.
Mr. Rowling was obviously trying to support polytheistic, devilish, satanic religions such as Roman religion through the obvious reference to Zeus, the Ruler of Electricity in Roman Theology. Mr. Rowling is attempting to corrupt your children by feeding them an idea that their idol, Harry Potter, looks up to the Electric God rather than the one true God, whom all true Americans know is the ruler of everything.
2. References to Led Zeppelin
Throughout the Harry Potter books, references are made repeatedly to the pornstar known as Led Zeppelin, who, as is common knowledge, is purely evil through and through. We know this because of one of his attempts at art- a song which, when played backwards, states quite clearly "I like the devil." The references run wild--from the snogging which has already been proven to the rampant sex occurring in almost every scene in the book. Also, there is a reference in the above mentioned song--when played backwards at a different part it states, in clear, annunciated English, "Harry Potter and I are both the work of the devil, who we like." I think the evidence speaks for itself.
3. Sex in the bushes? GAY sex in the bushes!
I invite you to all look at the scene in the book about the quadriwizardish cup, or whatever Mr. Rowling calls his devilish competition. The communist ruler of the wizarding country, Lord Dumbledore, tells the competitors that they if they need help they should "send up sparks" from within the bushes. So he encourages the four men to make sparks fly from behind the bushes!?!? I believe this is a blatant display of gay sex, which is well known to be evil.
4. Harry thinks he's Jesus!
Now who is the only person in the history of the world who could make himself invisible!? It was our Lord, Jesus Christ. He was invisible three times before he walked on water. He also turned himself invisible while killing death itself from the bowels of Africa during the three days after Easter. However, in the Harry Potter books this young man seems to have the ability to turn invisible whenever and wherever he chooses. Seems like someone's trying to take the role of Jesus! This is a known act of Satan, and so Harry Potter must be Satan himself.
5. Gluttony is good?
Yes, parents, you got that right. Mr. Rowling is, yes, trying to encourage the evil act of gluttony, which is against one of the 14 commandments and is also among the 3 deadly sins. By creating gluttons of the two major characters--Crabs and Goiley--Mr. Rowling is obviously encouraging kids to be fat. The two characters Crabs and Goiley are the two characters whom children are obviously intended to look up to, and in making them gluttons Mr. Rowling is effectively making gluttons of every man, woman, and child in the world--especially the USA. Therefore, Mr. Rowling is responsible for the fat people. And this gluttony leads to not enough for the poor people, and thus world hunger. So Mr. Rowling is also responsible for world hunger. He's an evil, evil man.
These five extra examples are just a few among the literally millions of reasons why Mr. Rowling is an evil person, and you should NOT let your children read about him. Reverend James Adams knows exactly what he's talking about, and should be worshiped as if he were Jesus Christ himself. Thank you all for your support of this obviously logical viewpoint, and I hope we can work to kill all nonchristians presented in this book--just as a good Christian is expected to do.
-Rev. Jack Matthews
1. Harry's scar = Zeus's lightning bolt.
Mr. Rowling was obviously trying to support polytheistic, devilish, satanic religions such as Roman religion through the obvious reference to Zeus, the Ruler of Electricity in Roman Theology. Mr. Rowling is attempting to corrupt your children by feeding them an idea that their idol, Harry Potter, looks up to the Electric God rather than the one true God, whom all true Americans know is the ruler of everything.
2. References to Led Zeppelin
Throughout the Harry Potter books, references are made repeatedly to the pornstar known as Led Zeppelin, who, as is common knowledge, is purely evil through and through. We know this because of one of his attempts at art- a song which, when played backwards, states quite clearly "I like the devil." The references run wild--from the snogging which has already been proven to the rampant sex occurring in almost every scene in the book. Also, there is a reference in the above mentioned song--when played backwards at a different part it states, in clear, annunciated English, "Harry Potter and I are both the work of the devil, who we like." I think the evidence speaks for itself.
3. Sex in the bushes? GAY sex in the bushes!
I invite you to all look at the scene in the book about the quadriwizardish cup, or whatever Mr. Rowling calls his devilish competition. The communist ruler of the wizarding country, Lord Dumbledore, tells the competitors that they if they need help they should "send up sparks" from within the bushes. So he encourages the four men to make sparks fly from behind the bushes!?!? I believe this is a blatant display of gay sex, which is well known to be evil.
4. Harry thinks he's Jesus!
Now who is the only person in the history of the world who could make himself invisible!? It was our Lord, Jesus Christ. He was invisible three times before he walked on water. He also turned himself invisible while killing death itself from the bowels of Africa during the three days after Easter. However, in the Harry Potter books this young man seems to have the ability to turn invisible whenever and wherever he chooses. Seems like someone's trying to take the role of Jesus! This is a known act of Satan, and so Harry Potter must be Satan himself.
5. Gluttony is good?
Yes, parents, you got that right. Mr. Rowling is, yes, trying to encourage the evil act of gluttony, which is against one of the 14 commandments and is also among the 3 deadly sins. By creating gluttons of the two major characters--Crabs and Goiley--Mr. Rowling is obviously encouraging kids to be fat. The two characters Crabs and Goiley are the two characters whom children are obviously intended to look up to, and in making them gluttons Mr. Rowling is effectively making gluttons of every man, woman, and child in the world--especially the USA. Therefore, Mr. Rowling is responsible for the fat people. And this gluttony leads to not enough for the poor people, and thus world hunger. So Mr. Rowling is also responsible for world hunger. He's an evil, evil man.
These five extra examples are just a few among the literally millions of reasons why Mr. Rowling is an evil person, and you should NOT let your children read about him. Reverend James Adams knows exactly what he's talking about, and should be worshiped as if he were Jesus Christ himself. Thank you all for your support of this obviously logical viewpoint, and I hope we can work to kill all nonchristians presented in this book--just as a good Christian is expected to do.
-Rev. Jack Matthews